In an article that could best be called a “True Mysteries of Technology”, Japan has been developing Smart Toilets. Or rather, Smart Bidets. (Yes, let the “toilet” humor begin)
This story in the Economist (pay-wall LINK) talks about all the innovations in potties through the adoption of the bidet in Japan (and other “civilized” countries). Some interesting facts pop out when perusing the article.
The top porcelain throne maker right now is Toto. (No, not that loveable dog from The Wizard of Oz). Beginning in 1980, they have been working on perfecting those jets of water and air (and you now get to pick the temperature at which it sprays your keester, heated seats (WOOHOO!), and air fresheners (Poo-pouri anyone?), and now are trying to break into the Western World.
While sales are leveling out and even decreasing in its prime market of Japan and some of Europe, Toto is looking to broaden its cheeks into America, the land of people with too much money and want a pretty potty. However, there is a downside to installing these in Western Washrooms. Power.
That’s right; most American bathrooms don’t have an outlet next to the john, making it very difficult to flush away for Toto’s future in the West. But who can remember those good ole days of the Covid-19 pandemic and the lack of toilet paper in all the stores? If you had a heated spray to flush your can with, who would really go back to using wads of paper? (Try living on 1-ply and see how badly you want a bidet instead…)
Where does this leave us? Hopefully, you’ve come to realize that technology is everywhere! Literally. You can’t even escape to your sacred privy for privacy anymore. Once Alexa or Siri is installed on these Cadillacs of W.C., then I think it’s gone too far. I mean, does Mr. Hankey really need directions a la Waze for anything? Or could you imagine what it would be like putting your shopping list through Siri whilst taking the kids to the pool? Just… some things don’t need to be smart. They just need to do the job.
At least we don’t have to worry about the 3 Seashells technique from Demolition Man.
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